Sparring and Training With Females

I think I need to weigh in on this because I do get a lot of questions because of the fact that my main training partner is a girl. I know there are so many opinions out there about training with females or cross-training over the genderborder.

For me it has been natural because when I trained and competed in Badminton way back, it was a mixed group and training with girls was not a strange thing. I know that there is a difference in martial art and jiu-jitsu. First of all we actually simulate harm on each other and the when it comes to jiu-jitsu we have the body contact. You actually have sweaty bodies rubbing against each other, especially when we talk about no-gi. Which can be very odd when you think about it.

But is this really a problem?

For me it is not and has never been. I am a small guy and my way of choosing training partners are based on weight. Also good chemistry and the way you complement each other is important. But whether it’s a guy or a girl, that doesn’t matter to me. Now it just so happens that Moa checked off all the right boxes and training together also made us really good friends. I have never thought about the fact that she is a girl when we rolled. For me, she is a good training body. Of course I understand that the female anatomy can be weird, but she does this for the same reason I do, and for us, our bodies are just body parts. In the midst of everything we never think about anything sexual or the fact that hands can end up in odd places. It is training and we help each other get better at jiu-jitsu, that’s all.

However, when you are new to the sport and haven’t found this comfort level, I think you have to be a little careful. Would I roll with a new girl in our white belt class as I do Moa? No, I wouldn’t, not until I know she is comfortable with the sport and the body contact. After all, it can take time to get used to it. But I will also show that there is nothing awkward about rolling either, we are just here too train jiu-jitsu. In the beginning, everything has to be on her terms though.

But funny fact here. I treat a new guy exactly the same. I mean think about it, how comfortable is it to roll around with another sweaty guy before you get used to it?

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